Robert De Niro isn't currently married, but his romantic history and family life have drawn public fascination for decades. While moviegoers know him for legendary cinematic roles in films like Taxi Driver, his personal relationships tell a different story of long-term marriages, high-profile splits, and a blended family spanning seven children.
The actor's romantic timeline features two formal marriages, significant long-term partnerships, and his current relationship with martial arts instructor Tiffany Chen. Understanding his private life requires looking past tabloid headlines to examine the actual history of his marriages and family milestones.
Diahnne Abbott: The First Marriage
Robert De Niro's first marriage was to actress and singer Diahnne Abbott. The couple met and married in 1976, around the time Taxi Driver hit theaters. Abbott appeared alongside De Niro in several notable films during that era, including New York, New York and The King of Comedy.
During their 12-year marriage, De Niro adopted Abbott's daughter from a previous relationship, Drena De Niro. The couple also welcomed a biological son, Raphael De Niro, in 1976. Raphael eventually stepped away from the entertainment industry to build a successful career as a luxury real estate broker in New York City.
Abbott and De Niro divorced in 1988, after which Abbott largely retreated from the public eye. Despite the split, they remained connected through their shared children and grandchildren.
Grace Hightower: The Longest Marriage
Following his relationship with model and actress Toukie Smith—with whom he welcomed twin sons, Julian and Airyn, via surrogate in 1995—De Niro entered his second major marriage. He married Grace Hightower in 1997 after meeting her years earlier at a London restaurant where she worked as a hostess.
Their marriage lasted for over two decades, making it De Niro's longest marital relationship. Together, they had a son named Elliot in 1998, and a daughter named Helen Grace, born via surrogate in 2011.
The couple experienced public ups and downs, including a filing for divorce in 1999 that was later smoothed over, followed by a final separation in November 2018. Their divorce proceedings played out across public legal battles over finances, but both maintained a focus on co-parenting their younger children.
Tiffany Chen: Current Relationship and Family Life
De Niro is currently in a relationship with martial arts instructor and actress Tiffany Chen. The pair first crossed paths on the set of the 2015 comedy film The Intern, where Chen played a tai-chi instructor.
Their relationship became public knowledge around 2021, and in April 2023, they welcomed a daughter named Gia Virginia Chen-De Niro. De Niro opened up in media interviews about becoming a father again later in life, noting the deep emotional fulfillment and occasional challenges of raising a young child at his age. Chen maintains a relatively low profile, supporting De Niro at select red-carpet events while managing her martial arts background and family life.
Navigating Privacy in Hollywood
De Niro has earned a reputation for fiercely guarding his private life. Unlike modern social media-native celebrities, he rarely grants access to his domestic routines, homes, or personal struggles. When legal or family matters spill into public view—such as high-profile custody discussions or divorce settlements—he typically addresses them through legal representatives rather than personal social media posts.
This boundary allows him to sustain a massive, multi-decade film career while keeping his children—who range from adult professionals to a young toddler—shielded from constant media intrusion.
Common Misconceptions About De Niro's Marriages
- He has only been married once: Many casual fans forget his first marriage to Diahnne Abbott, focusing entirely on his lengthy marriage to Grace Hightower.
- All of his children share the same mother: De Niro's seven children are split across four different relationships, including adoption, surrogacy, and biological children from his marriages and partnerships.
- His current partner is an actress by trade: While Tiffany Chen has minor acting credits, her primary professional background is as a champion martial arts instructor.
Frequently Asked Questions
Is Robert De Niro currently married?
No, Robert De Niro is not currently married. He is in a long-term relationship with Tiffany Chen, but has not remarried since his divorce from Grace Hightower.
Who was Robert De Niro's first wife?
His first wife was actress and singer Diahnne Abbott. They married in 1976 and divorced in 1988.
How many children does Robert De Niro have?
He has seven children with four different women: Diahnne Abbott, Toukie Smith, Grace Hightower, and Tiffany Chen.
How did Robert De Niro meet Tiffany Chen?
They met on the set of the 2015 movie The Intern, where Chen worked as a tai-chi instructor.
What is the age gap between Robert De Niro and Tiffany Chen?
The couple shares an approximate 41-year age gap, with De Niro born in 1943 and Chen born in 1984.
